Will you illustrate my haiku book for me...for free?

NO.

I have learned to say it so easily and effortlessly recently. I swear, I come home from a big blow out Bat Mitzvah and two people are writing books. And this is what they ask me. My retort is "Only if I am under a paying contract. Period. And that would be a genuine publisher's contract."

Seriously, everybody and their mother is writing a book. It is crazy. And scary.

I realize I am one of them but let's get real. This is something I have been working at for years. And I know not to ask such a cavalier (altho tonight it was caviar) question.

And illustrating is, um, work. For me that means money. Ya know.

Illustrating=Work=Money. Simple formula.