Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Aging gracefully

The Restaurant


A group of 40 year old girlfriends discussed where they should meet for lunch.

Finally it was agreed upon that they should meet at the Ocean View
restaurant because the waiters there had tight pants and nice buns.

10 years later at 50 years of age, the group once again discussed where they
should meet for lunch. Finally it was agreed that they should meet at
the Ocean View restaurant because the food there was very good and the wine
selection was good also.

10 years later at 60 years of age, the group once again discussed where
they should meet for lunch. Finally it was agreed that they should meet at
the Ocean View restaurant because they could eat there in peace and quiet
and the restaurant had a beautiful view of the ocean.


10 years later, at 70 years of age, the group once again discussed where
they should meet for lunch. Finally it was agreed that they should
meet at the Ocean View restaurant because the restaurant was wheel chair
accessible and they even had an elevator.


10 years later, at 80 years of age, the group once again discussed where
they should meet for lunch. Finally it was agreed that they should
meet at the Ocean View restaurant because they had never been there before.



As I reach the last month of my 40s (hah) I treated myself to a little snippet of realistic humor.

I FEEL GOOD AND I LOOK EVEN BETTER!! WOOHOO! And I'm going out tonight, too. But not to the Ocean View. Jazz baby. Good food and good friends.

Saturday, March 27, 2010

A side benefit of being a writer/illustrator

Your child has to write a two page horror story for school. And she needs your help. Ooooweeeeee!!

I ask, "Can it be funny?"

"Eeeeeeyeahhhhhhhh!"

"Can it be illustrated?"

"No."

"Rats."

"Well...maybe. But I was thinking more like sadistic mice terrorizing a pet cat."

Friday, March 26, 2010

Take that Look Off Your Face

and put it into your characters.

Do you get restless when your illustrated characters possess blank and vacuous physiognomies?

Do you droop when you produce rigid stick figures?

Then it is time for you to get Hands-fired!. Hands-fired! is the newest way to get some life into your stone-faced statue like subjects.

Simply install Hands-fired! on the ends of your pencils, markers...what have you and let it go to work. Instantly, magically your figures will come to life (and so will your fingers). They may even start moving off the page and jump into your lap. That should wake you up.

Hands-fired! has been discovered around the world by thousands of uninspired illustrators. You don't even need your brains anymore. Simply install Hands-fired! on the ends of your pencils, markers...what have you and let it go to work.

The beauty of Hands-fired! is that it has a life of its own. Even when you don't. Those kids nagging at you? That dog needs walking? That oven door blew off again? You can even leave Hands-fired! alone for a brief moment. Unlike your children, your dog or your door.

*(And when you come back you will miraculously have several animated characters on your double page spread. Some needing snacks, walks or naps.)

Hands-fired! keeps on going even when your hand cramps so hard you feel like you'll never,ever lift a drawing utensil againsil.

*We are working on the second installment of Hands-fired! so that you don't even have to hold the pencil. You turn it on and it just keeps on going.

Hands-fired! was tested by the brilliant creator of Where's Waldo. You think he did all those people all by himself? Think again. He had a plan. Or perhaps numbness and tingling in his thumbs and his fingering.

And we at Hands-fired! can attest to that. Because we hired Martin Handford to invent our new Hands-fired!. So get some expression into your work! Better your gestures with Hands-fired!!

Buy Hands-fired! now! And put some fire into your characters. And lay-off your hands!


(All those years of writing ad copy have finally taken their toll.)

Saturday, March 20, 2010

Can you tell me how to get... how to get to

Just about had a car crash today. Maybe it is because it is such a sunny day outside this last day of Whimper.

Or is it that whilst driving I lose myself in NJ's great jazz station 'WGBO" I am hearing hints of the music theme of Sesame Street. Wait a minute... I know what Sesame Street is and I am not going there. (We don't have one but we need one.) I think I even know what TV Broadcaster this is on. It is in a land called PBS. But heck. I am not on PBS. I am on Grove Street ( where is Grover?) I am in Montclair doing mindless yet meaningful errands.

Where the heck am I now?

This cool rendition of Sesame Street is telling how to get there. What a cool rendition of Sesame Street... these WGBO jazz musicians have found it... wow!

WGBO is great but I 'WIll Go Back Over' my directions. There is no Sesame Street here... in Montclair...

not yet.

But there should be. That would be such a sunny day!

Thursday, March 11, 2010

Happy Birthday Ezra Jack Keats!

Born today March 11, 1916


One of my favorite artists who made art from his heart. An artist who broke the mold with Peter, a boy protaganist of color. An artist who created intimate, private and large worlds for his characters to inhabit and explore. Simple, meaningful, right-there worlds for them.

Keats is one of my largest inspirations as an artist. And specifically as a collagist. I remember hearing and seeing his books as a child. Like it was yesterday. Melting in his snowy world.

He was so great at creating a tone and a mood with his work. A serene and fun snowy day. He captured how the youngest child experiences that cold, powdery, magical stuff.



But, hey. Honestly right now I am so glad winter is almost over.

Friday, March 5, 2010

Sad.

I really wanted to go to the conference this year. But between all the art supplies, the cost of submitting dummies (some being sent back unlooked at) I can't justify another expenditure. And it is a big one.

I've been at this for years; and making samples, copying them, and then making dummies and sending them out is becoming prohibitive. ILLUSTRATING IS EXPENSIVE.

Oh, and the writing classes and mentorships. And the website.

And the economy, and the kid in college.

I have to be frugal and pick carefully what I need. encouragement?

I really should be farther along than I am now. I know that. But that is okay.

I will persist, and one day the sun will shine on my project. Till then.....


Back To Work.


(There...my rare rant.)